Saturday, September 30, 2006

Black Belt

My wife is testing for her black belt today in Taekwondo. So no soccer or baseball today, we are going to La Jolla to watch her test as a family. She has been going after this for 6 years. She was going on and off because of my drinking. She didn't want to leave a drunk with her kids or someone who was passed out. Since I have been sober she has been going after her black belt with avenges. This is one of the promises the book talks about.

Friday, September 29, 2006

Tonight

Tonight I am not out drinking, but at home with my family. I guess this is how it works.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Back Way Home

I use to always take the back roads, when I was drinking. I never was caught.

Last Will

I really need to quit smoking soon. I just met with my life insurance woman and smoking is killing me on all angles.

posted on HNT

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Barbie

My friend Pete never thought Barbie could get depressed. click link

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Jewelry

Can't seem to find the right ring or necklace? This site has jewelry for only a few rubles.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Pride

I went to a meeting tonight with a friend of mine. I saw a couple people from my home group and that was cool. The meeting was all about pride. For me too much of anything is not good and that includes pride. I need just enough to keep my self esteem afloat and the rest could go down the drain for all I care. For me when I gave up alcohol I gave up a lot of my pride. Pride seems to be in a more manageable dose now.

The funny part is before I went to the meeting my boss sent me one of his snotty emails. So as a true alcoholic, I emailed him back with smart ass remark. I thought what an asshole how dare he, and now after the meeting I wish I didn't send the email.

Немцы жгут!

Cool site with loads of stuff you can use around the house to make your life more productive. Click link

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Meeting

I didn't go tonight to my meeting and now I wish I did. This meeting is one of the reasons why I am sober. I have been in my head today and that is not good.

Saturday, September 23, 2006

Tasks Complete

I had fun today with the kids hustling back and forth to the soccer games. What a trip it was, I felt so alive today with all the chaos. They all played great today and my youngest scored 5 goals. After we got home I gave them an hour break before the cleaning session began. All four of us attacked the mess together room by room. A few hours later the house was clean. The goal was accomplished and when my wife got home she was surprised, at least I think so. If I was drinking there is no way in hell I would have completed all that I did today. I would have been passed out on the couch or the floor or just walking around in my backyard drunk. Thank God for my friends and AA.

Friday, September 22, 2006

ü soccer

I am sitting here waiting for my kids to fall a sleep. Tomorrow my day will be spent @ the soccer and baseball fields. I am really not prepared to be spread so thin on time tomorrow.

My youngest and I really bonded today. It was great and I feel like we are closer. I give him a harder time than I do with the other two boys and I don't know why.

I am only ¼ done cleaning the house, so I have a long way to go. I am really trying to get it done before my wife gets home. I am just grateful that I know my kids ♥ me and that makes me happy.

10 Complaints Today

  1. Kids stayed home sick today.
  2. Car battery died. AAA, My three boys and PEP Boys Automotive (three brothers own).
  3. The dog threw up on the rug. Scrambled eggs are no more for me.
  4. The house looks like a hell hole. Not that I would know..
  5. My boss called and literally pissed me off. fuck him..
  6. My work is piling up. More work for the weekend..
  7. I am starting to feel sick. Oh no..
  8. There is nothing to eat in the house. Like steak or steak..
  9. We are out of cat food. I can't take my boys to the store..
  10. My wife for leaving me with these monsters. It is her fault..

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Monster Masks

I found this pre-Halloween treat. This guy is totally into chicks with monster masks. The photography is pretty cool, however it is a little creepy...Click link

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Fight

My wife and I still get in fights, however they are not much longer than a hour. That is, being mad at each other. I remember when I was drinking our fights seem to last for weeks. She also would never leave me with the boys to go on a trip. Now she is on a business trip and I have the boys. It is her first trip and the boys are sick. I kept them home today from school. I have a ton of work to do at the office, so I hope their feeling better tomorrow. Even though I am in the dumps today, these a quality problems.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

crazyegg Rocks

Crazyegg is one of the few companies to actually deliver above the hype on launch day. It is a cool marketing tool that helps you visualize your visitors in a CSI kind of way. I love the heat lamp overlay the best, because it makes you feel like a marketing detective. Thanks crazyegg... Click Link

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Bad Day

I am having a bad day. I don't know why, but I feel real down today. It feels like everyone is passing me by and I don't have the energy to catch them. I am wondering what the hell is going on. I feel so tired lately and I am not sick. I guess the best way to describe it is lost, just not there. Maybe if get some decent sleep tonight I will feel with it again.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

A pint in a packet

"It's a marriage made in pub heaven" link

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3D VULVA

When I was a kid I was never taught sex education. It was hoping the woman or girl had the experience. I even thought a Vulva was a car. Now the education is in 3D and I think it has lost some of the mystery. Link

Monday, September 18, 2006

Son


My youngest son has been sick. We have taken him to Children's Hospital twice now in a week. His thyroid was enflamed and they did blood tests for cancer, he was put on a large dose of amoxicillin. Now his ear blows out and is infected. I have been praying and trying to sleep.
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Robots

LockWasher engineers rayguns, rockets and robots in a retro style for people that watched the sci-fi channel. I want one or two..

Saturday, September 16, 2006

step by step

Step by step we all fall down.. link

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Spin this cat

My wife got a kitten 4 months ago and a cat is a new thing for me. I have a female lab and always had dogs growing up. I have to admit this cat is pretty cool, because it likes to attack the kids.

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Strange Statues around the World

Very cool, Link

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Friday, September 15, 2006

Cocktail Party

I went to a cocktail party in LA last night and there were a lot of fucked up people. The only time I was uncomfortable was when the people around me started the first drink. After half way into the second drink they were on the way to asshole land. That is when it hit me, this is one of the reasons why I stopped. I even felt that I had the upper hand, because my mind was clear, free of drugs and alcohol. We ended up eating in a trendy restaurant off Robinson and I actually had fun even though everyone else was drinking. I guess this is life on life's terms.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Honesty

Since I have been sober, I am amazed how little I have said I am sorry. I use to say I am sorry at least 25 times a day. The lies always caught up with me and one day my word had no meaning. The honesty in my program, myself and god is the reason why my life is no longer a lie.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Baby Suri

"Baby Sergi was picked up from a Scientology gift shop to be Suri's spiritual guide".

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Monday, September 11, 2006

Farm Animal

I have often wondered where unwanted farm animals go. I have heard horror stories of neglected farm animals. I have heard all good things about this organization,and all the the farm animal relief they provide. Woodstock Farm Animal Sanctuary

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9/11

The Path to 9/11
The Path to 9/11
The Path to 9/11
The Path to 9/11
The Path to 9/11

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Sunday, September 10, 2006

Mexico

I use to always go down to Mexico to get fucked up. There were so many fights I got into, but it always turned out that the federalies could never catch me. I had Mexican friends show me all the ways to hide. We hide in the backs of restaurants. Basically any store that had access to a back door I would use it for hiding. The reason for this photo is because this looks like the bar I would go regularly too drink tequila

GPS

This is really cool and has been a great addition to my phone. I now don't have to fear getting lost.

telenav link

Sex

This is what could happen, if you are thinking of looking for greener pastures. I saw this and thought of Network chic.

Saturday, September 09, 2006

lonelygirl15

I have found the real lonelygirl15 and below is her link. She is finally exposed and she is 32 years old. Some people are wack jobs.
Lonely Girl Link

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Search for God

When I was first getting sober I was searching for god everywhere. I had blamed him for my drinking and my life, so therefore the task of finding him was difficult. One day I went up to the abbey and walked, I could feel it was a spiritual place. I sat down and read the step 3 for the hundredth time, however this time was different I felt him by my side. It was a feeling of not being alone. I can still feel his presence most of the time. However sometimes I feel that my god is not there, so I search. Technorati Tags:

Friday, September 08, 2006

Pogo Stick

This guy is insane, he rocks on the pogo stick.



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BBC NEWS | Health | Children of alcoholics 'damaged'

This is a very good read.

Link to BBC NEWS | Health | Children of alcoholics 'damaged'

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Steve Irwin Attack

When I laughed at this video, I knew I had other character defects to work on.

    "Steve Irwin link"


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Thursday, September 07, 2006

Elbow on eBay

I am going to sell my elbow on eBay.

posted on HNT

A quarter of Russians have sex and are drunk while driving | The Register

Startling research aimed at determining why Russians are among the worse drivers in Europe has revealed that it can be largely attributed to a penchant for getting their ends away while behind the wheel, Mosnews reports.

Source: A quarter of Russians have sex while driving | The Register

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Right Track

I know that I am heading on the right track, because things are getting better. All the things that happened to me in my first year would not have bothered me as much today. Back then I was still in the fog and just fighting to stay sober. I was out there for a long time and it took its toll on my mind and body. I never thought to seek help because I didn't have a problem, so I thought. I was a morning, noon and night drinker and my body was shutting down when I got sober.

My first taste of AA was when I was in rehab, I wanted the program, and I wanted to live. I got a sponsor, a commitment and did 90 meetings in ninety days. I still attend at least two meetings a week. I am working the steps and living as close as I can to a normal life. That is, I am not hiding in the rooms of AA with worldly resentments and fear. Today I am living life on life’s terms.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

The Harry Smith Project

Harry Smith's "Anthology of American Folk Music" is the seminal compilation of the genre, inspiring generations of musicians. Now, some of the contemporary artists who have drawn from Harry's well have contributed to "The Harry Smith Project: Anthology of American Folk Music Revisited," a 2-CD/2-DVD collection of performances and documentary. The roster includes the likes of Beck, Wilco, Steve Earle, Richard Thompson, Beth Orton, Lou Reed, and Nick Cave.

How 9/11 affected the climate


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Kickass video and very informative on the effects of contrails.

Monday, September 04, 2006

Rose Colored Glasses

I use to see myself as a god full of ego, however today I stayed home and cleaned the house while my wife took my youngest son to the beach. The other two boys stayed home with me and played video games for awhile. They finally wanted to go outside and throw the baseball, I was in heaven. I have never pushed my boys in sports, so the chance to work with them made my day. I would love for them to play baseball since that is my sport of choice. We threw the ball for hours and now the pain is rolling in on my arm. I have had two surgeries and hundreds of cortisone shots in my arm. I need another surgery pretty bad, so I am hoping to schedule the operation around the end of the year. The last surgery I was good for about 7 years, with out too much pain, so I am hoping for a little longer on this surgery. Any ways, I had a killer time today and I am sober. It doesn't get much better than that.

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Just One Drink

We where at out neighbors house for a cook out/pool party.  The kids were having fun swimming and playing baseball. There were a few people drinking beer and mixed drinks. I don't let the people who drink around me bother me anymore. I use to hold resentments towards the friends who would drink around me, basically cutting relationships off. This just seemed to make things uncomfortable for my wife and kids. Any ways, the time was getting closer to when I had to go to my meeting. I was going back and forth about leaving, because I always leave on Sunday and go to the meeting. I knew my wife would be happy if I stayed, so that's what I decided.  I am glad I did because I had a really fun time. It also gave me a chance to heal some broken bonds I made after I got sober.

The kicker was that I went to the cooler to get a soda. The only thing left was 6 Pacifico's and I laughed because that wouldn't be enough for me. If I do pick up a drink it won't be just one.

Saturday, September 02, 2006

Sunset

We had another rad sunset tonight, and had a fun day. There where a total of 10 kids over today playing or just hanging out. They always love to come over to our house because it is zoned for kids. They were running around and just being kids, utter chaos.

I always liked the chaos and action flowing around me. I grew up in a big family and people were always coming and going. I think the chaos had a big part in my sobriety. Because I could not stay isolated for long and the boys drained all my thinking energy. Life is good today and I am sober.

Labor Day Weekend

Every holiday weekend we get an influx of people to our meeting. They usually stay around for a couple meetings then they are gone, back in denial. This is a good time for service work, telling them they don't have to live that way anymore, and there is a better way. It also helps me seeing these fresh faces, they help me remember my last few weeks of drinking.
We are just kicking it this weekend and staying local. We will probably go to the beach, cook out and maybe go hiking. Have a good weekend.