no step study

Should have went should have gone but didn't. I need to pull up my sober boot straps.

My wife is going to Rome for 10 days and I am stuck with the kids. Departure is a week away and I am not ready for her leaving.

ok today

You know this shit is deadly. I feel my life is hanging on a thread sometimes, but I just dont drink for the day and thats how I get through. Sometimes that is what you have do to stay sober. I am talking with others in the program so thank god for that because it keeps me accountable. Tomorrow will be differnt. The storm always passes.

spin zone

Lack of, I need church and meetings because I feel like I am standing on the perimeter. This is the sign I recognize well it means something has to change fast or I will lose the gift. Sobriety is that gift.

Aiken is Gay??

rough times

Wow I have been riding the roller coaster to hell this week. One project almost turned into a disaster and repeating the mistakes from last year. It turned out OK, but my head and neck are permanently damaged from the aftermath. I am having these stress headaches and they feel like a bad hangover. I can't drink them away anymore so I just try to work through them.

All the boys play tomorrow, so the schedule is a 8:00 am soccer game, 12:00 pm football game and a 3:00pm football game. I think the games will keep me out of the dangerous bowels of my head.

remember

I keep those last days very close in my memory. It sometimes seems so long ago and yet at times seems like yesterday. I don't want to go through that all over again.. So I try my best to stay close to the program.

new key

I am adding a new key back into my daily life. When I was drinking there was no room for god and if anything god was working against me.

The sports day tomorrow for the boys is going to be a lot of runing around.

doing

I have to attend a convention tomorrow in SD, wow.. The brochure is geeky and it says surfs up. Anyways I hope to get some biz out of the show.

A friend gave me 4 tickets for the Padre game on sunday. We are going to be 3 rows up from home plate which are the best seats in the house. The boys are going crazy because we will be so close to the players and they are taking their gloves.

drama queens

Damn the meeting I attend has more drama than a midwest hair salon. I guess as alcoholics we feed off of that..

I am going to bed early tonight in a effort to gain back some lost sleep.

sunday

I am so tired today and I had to clean the garage, yikes.. I feel my arms burning and that is a good thing because I need the exercise.

I have to go to a meeting tonight and I feel like bagging the whole deal. I just want to stay at home and sleep. Oh well that is when I need to go, when I don't want to go, if that makes sense.

loft

I built a loft for my oldest son and what a pain in the ass. I decided in order to save money I would download the instructions instead of forking out $400.00 for the pre-cut and pre-drilled lumber. I spent $100.00 at home depot and 500 hours of manual labor, meaning me and my wife.

Football games today + one soccer game. My youngest son played the whole game as quarterback, yeaah.. He scored a running touchdown and threw a pass for a touchdown. Middle son scored the only two goals for his soccer team and my oldest son struggled to stay on the football field because of a sprained wrist.

I need to organized my calender tomorrow, because i have so much traveling going on lately.

addiction

Lack of meetings have the mind working with all the voices. The voices that want me dead.. So I need to attend a meeting tomorrow night in Las Vegas. I will be there for two days and thats a dangerous place for me because it has all I want.

life is strange

I want to preface this post by saying this photo is not me. I am stating this just in case someone is confused.

What a fucked up weekend. It began Saturday morning when my 6 year old "star to be" quarterback decided to run off the field after the second play. He was done with football. I asked him what was wrong and on the first play he ran for 20 yards and ended up close to the opposing sideline where the parents heckled him.. After prodding him for 40 mins he went back in on defense as safety. Parents suck sometimes.

My oldest is acting like a drama queen citing multiple injury's each time he feels like not playing.

We were at our friends cookout on Sunday when we saw a plume of smoke and we ran towards it to see where the fire was located. Several blocks down was a house on fire. So as a good alcoholic I ran to see it and as I arrived the fireman asked me and a couple others from our party to pull the hose. That was cool, and my first experience with pulling hose... lol, so you guys can have at that one...

back in the saddle

Thanks MC for bringing me out of the closet, not literally. As usual I have been busting ass especially in this wonderful economy George "got bush" helped us into. He is a dry drunk, so no wonder we are in this mess. George come to my meeting and I will stick a boot in your ass.

The boys football games start tomorrow and I am excited... yeaaah. I am looking forward to seeing my boys kick ass, and my youngest is the quarterback, how cool. I am really doing good with the program it has changed my life and I am blessed.

what to say and what not to say during sex

still watching

Hey dave you can't HALT Michael Phelps.. What a great night I am glad the Olympics don't last to much longer or I will end watching it with my crack pipe..lol

I watched my middle son at his soccer game and he scored a hat trick and had 5 assists. He is my hero today.

My foot was better today so the boys couldn't get away from me, but they all were good today for me, which is unusual.

7 States Consider Lowering the Drinking Age

clipped from www.asylum.com 7 States Consider Lowering the Drinking Age (Our happy-hour fact to amaze your drinking buddies with.) Kentucky, Missouri, Minnesota, South Carolina, South Dakota, Wisconsin and Vermont are debating legislation or planning ballot initiatives that would lower the drinking age. Proponents of the change have been aided by the argument that it's unfair to consider men and women mature enough to fight in Iraq and Afghanistan, but not responsible enough to buy alcohol legally. Opposition is fierce, with organizations including Mothers Against Drunk Driving lining up to thwart the efforts of groups like Missouri 18 to Drink. No matter what, the outcome of the clash will be determined over the coming months. Meanwhile, look for the number of college applications to spike in Kentucky, Missouri, Minnesota, South Carolina, South Dakota, Wisconsin and Vermont. Don't Drink and Click: The Drunk Girls of MySpace And our Hammered Heroes... Our Favorite Drunks Ever

olympics killing me

The Olympics are killing me with lack off sleep. I am an addict and I have become addicted to watching the games.

My wife has headed to her grandfathers 90th birthday on the east coast and I am home alone with the boys. I also got a staff infection on my foot so I can't catch the little monsters, so I am basically screwed until she gets back.

The job is still screwed, but I am making progress on my green projects. So I guess that is ok for now.

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funked up

little fury this is a cool site check it out.

Well I just got back from the vet and the cat has maggots, OMG. The estimate was between $925.00 and $1295.00. So I gave the vet a deposit of $700.00 and will pay the rest tomorrow when I pick up baby. The vet said that this is common with inside outside cats in the summer time in socal. Shit, I hope this won't be a common occurrence with our cat. Hell the dog doesn't have maggots and her anus is bigger. I hope some you are eating when you read this post..

the better way is AA

I am still trying to help little gang banger.. He is back on drugs now and just waiting on the call when he is in jail..

life

I as always have to many balls in the air and not just two, daave. I am fighting to make it everyday and that sucks but this is what I have to do for now. Long hours and dark circles are the theme to my life. I am still sober so that makes me a winner. If you didn't drink or use than you are a winner too.

I have two things that are my primary to my existence and they are god and the program.