No Excuse

“The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The drunk says, 'Are you gonna drink that'?" Robert G. eschewing the philosophical for the practical. “You’re paying off like the world’s worst slot machine.” Rick E. watching his friend regurgitate expensive scotch outside the Whiskey Bar. “You have abused the right to say something stupid.” Tom B. in Orlando after getting his fill of his barstool neighbor. “I tried drinking myself to death. Now I have to get my health back just so I’ll have the strength to jump in front of a bus.” Tracy M. switches mortal gears in Manhattan, KS. “The damn wagon’s too crowded anyway.” Anonymous drunk about to take a fall in front of the Lions Lair Lounge. “The drinking will continue until you show a dramatic improvement in attitude.” Sandy T., 28, addressing her “uppity” liver at the Cockpit Lounge. “Everybody gets fucked over by the world sooner or later. It just happened to you a little sooner than you probably expected.” Bonnie B. comforting a heartbroken friend at the Squire Lounge.